Why do I care so much about some guy who doesn’t even have the decency to text back and tellbme he’s not infsrestsd.

So lemme get this off my chest

I went on my first date ever with this guy I met at a rush mixer my pledge sister and I set up. He messaged me on Facebook out of nowhere and after talking to him for a few days, he took me out on a date. He picked me up and we chatted a little before asking if I was ticklish. Of course he tried to tickle me and it worked. On our way to the movies, as I used my phone for directions and was horrible at giving them we had to pull over and figure out where the fuck we were going. After we looked at the map he proceeded to tickle me. I tried to tickle him back, but couldn’t. Finally we reach our destination and he starts to tickle me. I grab his hand go get it away from me and he locks the fingers into each other. He uses the other hand to pish my hair away from my face and asks me if I’m ticklish under my chin. As our heads rest against each other I realize what’s going to happen next. I just don’t know when it will.. The tension was killing me and it felt right, so I went for it and kissed him. Immediately I backed away and he asks me whats wrong. Thats when my mind went blank. It was my first kiss! I’m sorry, I say. He asks what to be sorry about. And I tell him that I’m sorry for kissing him …like an idiot. He tells me I don’t have to be and I can kiss him again so we continue to kiss. He grabs my body towards him and stops only to ask if I want to go in the backseat. He’s obviously played this game before. No, I respond, I want to watch a movie. He asks if I’m sure. And I tell him yes that’s what we came to do. He looks frustrated and I ask if he’s mad. He says he’s not. When we reach the movies he pays for my ticket even though I offer to pay for my own. He uses the restroom while I wait. We have two hours to kill. While we wait outside, he is touchy but distant. It seems like he wants to get close but also is distracted by the people passing by and continuously asks for the time. I try to keep his attention on me and ask him questions. I want to get to know him. Finally it comes time that we can go in. I find that the seats are reclining and it kind of intimidates me to be honest. I ask if he’s gone here before and he has. Its obvious he’s played this game before. While we lay on the seats he’s super touchy still and we flirt until we are kicked out of the theater so they can clean. We go outside and he finds and outlet to charge his phone. We sit and I see my sorority sister. She comes downstairs and we chat before she leaves with her date. Then its movie time. He doesn’t try to touch me again. Movie is over and we get back into the car. More small flirting and we get home. I hug him goodbye and don’t make the first move again. He doesn’t kiss me goodbye or anything. I don’t know what to think

I would usually be able to laugh things off, but how badly I want you is taking over every cell of my body.

manual:

Your body is 65% water and I’m thirsty

"The only time he loves me is naked in my dreams"

-Noname Gypsy

I literally cannot sleep because

My silly heart can’t keep up all running in circles you make it do.

Keep getting butterflies I can’t even think straight anymore when will I know if he feels the same way?

I miss your salty cigarette lips already.